Viridi's Unnaturalove
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: Viridi is desperate for someone to love her. Being the prankster that he is, Thanatos suggest her to hook up with Dry Bowser. It doesn't go as well as you would expect.
1. Chapter 1

_Ohohoho! It was your usual day in the world of Kid Icarus, but you weren't here for that dorky winged angel with the big appetite or his green gassy goddess, you were here for a bratty one. You know who. The one infamously known the world over as the reset obsessed **Viridi!**_

"Oh put a lid on it you loser!" Viridi snapped as she was getting tied of hearing Thanatos doing a monologue, with them being near her temple. "You're annoying enough to just see!"

"Doh come on, blondie, you know you love it when I do that!" Thanatos laughed as he moved his hands about, having been roaming around the Sky World for quite some time as he was in search for some quality entertainment. "In fact, there's not much for anyone here to love about you!"

"Eh!? What's that suppose to mean, you clown!?" Viridi snapped as she whacked her staff on his head like the obnoxious girl she was.

"Oww! I mean you can't possibly manage to get a hook with anyone here... even if they're from a different dimension!" Thanatos pointed out after rubbing his head.

"Really now? Well just watch me prove you wrong!" Viridi grumbled as she puffed her face cheeks like a balloon. "I bet I could get anyone to fall over for me!"

"...Can you manage to get him then?" Thanatos chuckled as he pointed at Dry Bowser, who was reading through some scrolls he found.

"Hmm... I'm pretty sure I went through the wrong warp." Dry Bowser said to himself as he shook his head. "Oh well. I'l just get the beef for the burgers here."

"Hah, an unnatural sight. But he is made of bones and considered a legend for his shielding..." Viridi mumbled as she shook her head, clenching her right fist. "I'll do it! You just watch!"

Thanatos watched as Viridi approached Dry Bowser, trying not to burst into laughter as he wondered how bad this situation was going to go for her.

"Hey bonehead!" Viridi called out as she placed her hands on her hips.

Dry Bowser squinted his beady eyes as he glared down at the short goddess of nature. "Huh? What do you want, pipsqueak?"

"LOVE ME!" Viridi snapped as she got into the reptilian skeleton's face, with her bad breath being enough to cause his skull to get a few small cracks in it.

Dry Bowser took a moment to think about it as he smirked and left, leaving Viridi to cry like a bitch as Thanatos began to laugh.

"Told you it wasn't easy!" Thanatos pointed out as he wiped a tear of laughter from his eye. "In fact, maybe you should just give up now!"

"No way!" Viridi barked as she clenched her fists angrily. "I will get that skeletal reptile, and he will be mine!"

Thanatos still had his devious smirk on his face as Viridi's stomach grumbled, making the goddess have a delightfully devilish grin herself as she tapped her fingers together evilly.

"I know what to do... I'll force him to look at my plant collection!" Viridi screeched as she brushed back her hair. "And I'll force him to listen to all the types of botanic species that is out there!"

"Pretty sure no one wants to here you mouth off, you geek." Thanatos snorted as he had his big arms folded.

"Oh shut up!" Viridi blurted as she chucked her staff at him, proceeding to dash after Dry Bowser. "Hey, wait up!"

"Oh for crying out loud... can't you take a hint?" Dry Bowser growled as he was getting sick of her presence.

"You listen to me, you baka!" Viridi roared as she grabbed some of his bones, chucking them behind her. "We're gonna go on a date, and you're gonna like it!"

"And what if I don't?" Dry Bowser questioned while brushing his red hair.

Viridi clenched her fists as she gritted her teeth. "Then I'll reset the world until you fall for me!"

Dry Bowser looked in the distance to see Thanatos laughing his head off, with the bony dinosaur dragon thinking to himself as he snapped his fingers.

"You're not going to like where this will go." Dry Bowser warned as he began charging up his charcoal shell, with it glowing red.

"Oh I'm liking it already, you beefy lunk!" Viridi said with a hint of sarcasm while licking her lips. "Now that I have you right where I want you-"

Viridi could not finish her sentence for she was electrocuted by Dry Bowser, who then fired blue fire on her as he was quick to take off. Thanatos enjoyed this situation as he knew that it would backfire on the goddess.


	2. Chapter 2

Viridi was trying her best to court Dry Bowser as she was failing, with the annoying bitchy goddess of nature having acquired all the most obscure flowers she could find as she spotted the skeletal reptile admiring the river, with them being away from the creepy looking purple forest that spawned after having a reset powered explosive dropped upon it. Of course, Thanatos was there to watch it fail spectacularly since he enjoyed things going wrong for the gods he loved pranking.

"Hey bonehead! I got you some rare flowers!" Viridi shouted while shoving the flowers right into his face, with her still being unaware of how annoying she actually was since she had no self awareness.

"Sure whatever." Dry Bowser calmly shrugged off as he continued looking at the water's waves, ignoring her pitiful advances.

Viridi began to steam as she took in a deep breath, shaking her head. "Look you spooky bastard, I'm trying to get you to fall for me, and this is what you're doing!?"

"How about you do something of value that doesn't involve you being a moron?" Dry Bowser pointed out as he brushed some dust off of his bones.

"Look just take these flowers already!" Viridi snapped as she chucked the plants at Dry Bowser, who simply blinked as Viridi began tugging her hair.

"Ha! I knew it!" Thanatos laughed as he pointed forward. "You still don't have it in you to get him! You're so pathetic!"

"You shut your mouth, fatso!" Viridi barked as she flailed her arms about.

Dry Bowser shook his head in disappointment, folding his bony arms. "You see, acting like that will get you nowhere-"

Viridi whacked Dry Bowser's skull off his body with her staff, puffing as her face was red. Dry Bowser's head landed in the water, with his body diving right into it to retrieve it as Viridi realized what she had did. Thanatos continued laughing it up as he was enjoying the nature goddess making a complete idiot out of herself.

"Ah shit! This isn't suppose to happen!" Viridi groaned, placing her hands on her head.

"Well who's fault is that, blondie?" Thanatos taunted with a smirk on his face, being whacked by Viridi's staff as he groaned. "Hey! You do that again, and I'll swipe it from you!"

"Don't make me drop a reset bomb on your ass, ya tub of lard!" Viridi bellowed as she dashed off alongside the river, trying to catch up with the stream.

Dry Bowser managed to place his now soaking skull back onto his also wet body, watching Viridi dashing alongside the river as he smirked. "After all that, and you still desperately want me?"

"It's not like I have much of a choice!" Viridi panted as she was beginning to sweat. "I realize that your spirit is as legendary as mine, and thus I must have sex with you!"

"Not on your life." Dry Bowser dryly responded.


End file.
